Yesterday night at youth service and cell group was a huge encouragement and a very very big testament of how God works in marvellous ways through each one. During testimony giving time, it was just person after person after person thanking God for something in their lives, and it's not very frequent that we've had such forthcoming responses. It was to the point where my iPod played finish one entire Hillsong album, and we're still not done. But what made it particularly satisfying and edifying to me was how quite a lot of those from my old/new cell group came up to share! If somewhere throughout the week something good happens in one of their lives that makes them excited enough to tell me, I will usually tell them go up and give testimony on Fri, and then they will be like "oh nooo cannot I shy I scared blah". But most times they do anyway, as long as I make the right bargains like buy them bubble tea heh!

Standing up and being visible and displaying thankfulness is something that some of my friends firmly believe in, it kinda rubbed into me overtime throughout the years. But nothing beats seeing your own cell group people gathering courage to stand up there and testify of the Lord's goodness. Okay la it only works for me and my cell haha because I'm so old and they're so young. But I have to say, even though I always encourage and force and coerce and plead and bargain with them to give testimony, when they eventually stand up there in front, none of them has ever said anything resembling Guan You told me to come up. Okay it's unexplainable the joy and elation that I feel haha.

Vivian's testimony included being happy to come to church and looking forward to Fridays and Sundays. I need to start going about in that same attitude too, not that I pull a long cucumber face in church, but I need to keep reminding myself to be expectant of God's miracles.

Alright here's one tiny confession about reading and books. I quite like receiving books for presents, and I do enjoy reading. But thing is, the books that I usually leave on the shelves unread are the ones that I get from presents! And they usually stay there for months and months until I need something to read, then I will remember that I have that book and hence the birth of a new read. Those are my "low priority" books, my high priority ones tend to be school-related or I need to finish this literature novel for my class or this textbook. Then the middle and in-betweens tend to be the books that I buy for myself, because when I spend money on something then I will have a higher impetus to make it worthwhile.

And when I do buy books for other people, I tend not to get familiar books or books that I've already read before. That's cos I am usually bewildered whenever I step into any library or bookshop, there's too many books at my choice disposal, so I usually end up getting books which I am interested to read, or books that look interesting. In that process I'm also hoping that when this particular friend finishes the book, they can lend it to me!

Now you know what to do if you received books from me before, or if you receive books from me in future!

Something I never got around to blogging, was the previous combined territorial youth service's worship. For all of last year, every combined meeting or camp that the Youth Dept organised, I was among the musicians/leaders singing and playing. That in itself is a pretty amazing opportunity which I had the privilege to be a part of. And ministry work always works out into huge blessings for me; I sing and I hear the congregation singing back to God, which kinda makes worship leading such a pivotal role to me. But at the same time I don't get to be part of the congregation and most times I don't get to experience worship from the pews! So it was with much relish and delight that I wasn't part of the music team two weeks ago, presumably cos I was already giving a short sharing. And I've gotta say, whoo hoo! Great atmosphere, it was just electrifying. That's not to say that the normal Sundays and Fridays and whatever other services have lacklustre atmospheres, cos I am trying to learn how to worship from the heart and not from the music I hear now, hence I can't put myself down to such comparisons.

School's into its second week, I gotta start to focus now.

Ten or eleven days into this side of the 2011 new year, and nary a blog post! Surely my life isn't that uneventful. Okay, the last things I recall doing over the weekend that just passed included a 10-minute message at territorial combined youth service, and leading worship on Sunday service. I haven't shared any messages or sermons in a long time, so to foreground a 10 minute speech I have to prepare like 10 hours? And same goes for leading worship; of late I have been forgetting lyrics and getting the jitters when I'm midway singing. But again, it's always His grace at work, and my words and my songs are not worshipful if they are not His, so ughhh more preparation more planning more practice.

I am, in most manner of things, excited about the new things this year. New cell group, new lessons in school, new books, new ventures... I am also trying to plan a holiday in June or July! Hahaha shall see where that will take me.

I'm five hours into the last day of 2010, and I generally think that my thought processes flow best after midnight if I want to write something. I mean, look at the assignments which I have to do for school! The bulk of almost every essay's content that I did for this year was written when everyone in my house is asleep and snoring. So I kinda figured that now's a good time for me to write my traditional reflection post on the year that is passing, in the light that the newer year is coming. I have a strange suspicion that I missed the last two years' worth of reflections, because I've either been too busy or I just wasn't as bothered to sit down in front of the computer. But tonight, the stars are in the right alignment, I've found the right position in my seat, the keys tapping away on my laptop make for nice accompanying sounds this late into the night... So a long blog post to toast a great year!

I think the biggest highlights of this year were the extensive mileages that I've clocked for my passport and for myself! It was the first time I've been to so many countries and cities in a single year. Was in Bangladesh getting all flustered to meet my World Vision adopted child for three years, and battling heavy rain in the Sundarban mangroves. The new friends I met on the trip were some of those who taught me the greatest lessons in life, although I have not been so faithful to attend the gatherings after the trip because of worship leading at Gracehaven! Both times! Was also in Europe getting to Paris, Berlin, Amsterdam, Stockholm, and a 5-hour transit in Brussels cos of train delays, getting to all the must-gos and must-sees and must-dos, which included streets, cathedrals, monuments, buildings, blah blah. Great company from David and Yurong! And spectacular Salvation Army youth conference in Stockholm which pretty much justified my initial doubts. I don't really travel a lot unless there's a utilitarian function to it, and holidays with family are once in a blue moon. But now I think I really do need that kind of break to be totally away from everything and to just soak! Okay where shall I go in 2011 for personal holiday?

Without a doubt, I have to say something about my cell group again. I can stamp my foot down to say that they are some of the best people I've met in my life thus far, and it's my awesome privilege to be a part of their lives for this year (and for some of them, almost three years!). There's a previous post dedicated for them already, but I still want to emphasize the impact they have on my life and my ministry, because I really was this close to leaving everything this year, but commitment to them comes almost above everything else that I do in church, and there's no way I can leave them floundering. Blessed beyond words for all the lives that I've met, and nope, fifty new friends in those three years is not a misnomer. They just keep bringing their friends and new people just keep coming and I keep having to learn new names and be involved with new things for each person's life. Last cell group outing two days ago had 16 people cycling or blading, without full attendance! It's quite a joy watching them grow in faith, grow in maturity, grow in size/height/weight over the years, and the silly things they do or the weird hairstyles they had when they were younger. Okay I was once like them too haha. A huge thanks to them for all the fun and laughter and meaning and purpose and lessons learnt. And a very special mention to Jolene for doing all the things that I didn't do, for being the cheerleader, supporter, counsellor, mother, teacher, scold-and-scolder... Haven't spent as much time and effort with you as I would like to, but I assure you you're doing a great job, it's an absolute delight all these years and you're still important in my life!

And there's the other major role that I do at church, which put simply requires me to go onstage to sing and play guitar at the same time. Except that I often forget it's as much a leadership position that requires me to also draw people to the mercy seat, to connect people with God, to turn eyes to Jesus. I didn't lead worship as frequently as I used to do this year compared to in previous years, but still there was a very marked change in my perspectives and style and musicianship. Mind-blowing at the territorial youth camp which was just hours and hours of praising and worshipping, and in part also to very good mentors and advisors that I've met this year, and also in part to the huge amounts of time that I used to devote to doing chordsheets!! Hahaha what an unlikely source, but in the past I used to twiddle with the keys of a song a lot, and I would transpose songs into different keys for hours on end just to try, which was also when I wasn't a very good guitarist. Then all those efforts paid off now when I can look at a chordsheet, decide that I want to do capo 7, then right on the spot transpose and surprise myself by getting 80% of the chords right. The other 20% is a murk. At the start of the year I felt like God was getting me to mentor people in this area as well, and I thought okay well one or two will be cool, I can mess up their lives a bit hahaha, but they came in droves and there's five of them now that probably show far more potential than what I can teach them with. Corps youth camp worship deserves their credit, I didn't do much at all.

I usually don't have anything good to say for school, but sometimes being a Geography major gets you somewhere in life, because I learn about so much social things and quite a bit of current affairs and other heady ideological stuff, that it helps me to pretend I'm smart at some things. But yeah, I'm probably one of those students who study just enough and skip the additional readings, get decent and respectable grades and whoohoo. Either I'm really smart and brilliant for this year, or I just happened to study the correct things right before exams. In any case, I want to be a better student next year! I'm getting like mostly B+s for everything, but I shall resolve to do better than that because I know I have the time and the discipline to study more if I just managed my time better.

More time for other things.

And that basically sums up my entire year... With a bit of what I want to do next year. I think top priority goes to the new cell group, the new mentees that are coming under my charge, to worship leading and where it will take me. Family's right there near the top too! Okay it's time for bed, it's been a blessed year.

Cell group outing yesterday! Kinda envisioned it as a conclusion to this year, and before they all disappear to other cells. Hence it was a lot of pregnant, poignant moments that made me treasure each of them for the person they are.

We were at East Coast Park cycling or roller-blading the whole afternoon, then Parkway for dinner, before we all decided to go Andrea's house, with the werewolf game and with lots of chili and black pepper crabs!

Okay cell group, great times being your leader.

The Christmas weekend was a good respite from everything. It kinda felt like I hadn't got a proper holiday yet! Since my last exam for last semester, everyday went something like wake up, rush for this, rush for that, do this do that. I want a day where I'm just home (and prefably in bed) just lazing and taking things at a snail-leisurely pace to do irrelevant things without any pressure or deadlines. I led worship on Christmas morning, which kinda came hot on the heels after youth camp, so I was quite exhausted of having to prepare for yet another worship set.

Of course, one of the eagerly-anticipated traditions that we do every year, is the after-service gifts and cards exchange! Usually I receive gifts that require me to eat them, but this year I think I've got a slightly more percentage of stuff that I can use/display/read rather than stuff which I have to consume. Hahaha either way, thanks to all those who gave me presents and/or cards for Christmas! I expect the guilt game to continue every year, because I've decided about a few years back that I shall not go down the road of writing cards and giving mass presents to everyone. So this year was just cards to leaders, some presents to certain individuals, and long essays in cards to cell group people! And, managed to hit town a few times this December for the glimmering lights! Which, in past years, have been rather non-existent because of various commitments.

I've got about two or three more weeks before school starts again. I'm looking to read productively, although at the rate that I read, I probably will give up whatever novel I'm embarking on once the school term kicks in.

Back from our corps youth camp! God's been great, it was a lot of fun and a lot of learning. Might have only been 3 days, but I felt that it was long enough to do quite a lot of things! I think half the campers were 15 and below, so that means they fall directly under my cell group or to-be cell groups, and my prayers are answered! Everybody's integrated and mingled and mish-mashed and jumbled up, waaay younger people talking to waaay older people blah blah. It kinda feels weird for me to be a gatecrasher with not much responsibilities, I'm neither an active participant nor am I a full-fledged group leader for camp hahaha! Worship was great, with the very talented team of new leaders on board. They sorted out their own practices and songs and music while I was away at ICT last week, so I had to find something to play on the guitar that didn't clash with them. My guitar capo was my lifesaver for three-quarters of the songs, and a lot a lot a lot of on-the-spot transposing in my head oh my gosh I should go memorize the Nashville system really soon. Or just play everything by ear, which might be slightly faster.

Alright, I'm kinda just rambling, real tired out from insufficient sleep.

My mind goes towards the testimonies and affirmations that Jolene suggested we do during cell group time on Friday night. Last Friday was the last youth service for the year, and poignant because three-quarters of my cell will be "graduating" and moving into older cell groups next year. Think I've mentioned it before, but this is the first time in quite a few years that another cell group of mine is breaking up. So Jolene decided we should give thanks to someone within the cell for whatever influence and impact that helped shape our personal lives. And sitting there listening to each of their sharings, I realise how much I'm going to miss this bunch of people. It didn't seem like it at the start of this year, but I think all of them changed a lot a lot, became wiser and older and more intelligent and more responsible. Small things that didn't seem to matter a lot to me at that time suddenly meant so much more, which is real ironic because once again I underestimate the significance and the weight of what God can do with my brokenness.

Anyway, I'm trying out my last grasps of reaching out to them where I can! A bit belated but I have been too busy this whole year. Writing cards and wrapping presents now. Have to put up a disclaimer for this Christmas, cards for the cell group and for the youth leaders! And presents only for the mentees and camp worship leaders hahaha. Cell group presents already given out. I'm running out of time to write cards, and I firmly believe that each card should come with an essay, so it's gonna take some time. Hahaha okay that's all back to work!

I'm back to work! A week-long break in army kinda distanced me from everything, but it was great meeting up with the old friends again. Yesterday I went shopping for stuff I will need for the youth camp! Haha so exciting to be buying shampoo and toothpaste and whatever else. Usually I would do this extremely last minute, and most of the times I would have them already at home, but my stay in army camp kinda depleted all these toiletries so I had to buy. Excited!! I can't wait for it, the worship leaders have been very active in my absence, but I have not even printed out their chordsheets to practice yet! Shall do it tonight, which means it will probably get to a very late hour.

I am staring at the amount of Christmas cards I have to write, and I need to do a lot of things for a lot of things. I wish I have a personal assistant for this haha.

And off to Lynn and Min Jie's wedding in a bit!

It seems like the past few days were jam packed with activities. It was like one after the other, meetings and practices and services and meeting up with people or going out with some of the cell members, then at night rushing home to complete everything that needs to be done. I've always believed in the wonders of technology, for all of it's simple and cheap/free interfaces for all forms of communication! So it was emails and SMS and MSN galore, tonnes of things to do. I actually meant to finish writing my Christmas cards, but I have not even started on any one thus far.

Andrea sent a rather thought-provoking message today, because she was deluded in her Pluto-world. But she said something to the effect of when you get into space and you float by all the giant planets and stars, it's only then you realise how small you really are. It kinda brought me back to earth, because sometimes due to pride or whatever, it is just so easy to ignore the smallness of myself. I can slog my guts out with all the stuff to do, but if I'm not mindful of the larger schemes then I'm missing the point.My early new year resolution is to be a better cell leader and better worship leader.

Okay, off to bed, I'm away for a week at ICT, army, camp, training, reservist, whatever you call it. This is both welcomed and unwelcomed, because it forces me to take a breather from whatever I'm involved in, but at the same time this is an extremely wrong timing for me to be away. But oh well, nothing to be undone.

Was doing Christmas kettling and hanging out with Jeremy Hee Jeremy Kwan Jing Yang and Andrea yesterday in town! This year's kettling at AMK Hub is dissolved, we went to Centrepoint to help with Gracehaven's slots instead. But what's more remarkable is, the company that I did kettling with, they're people from my cell whom I seldom contact outside of the weekend! I think it's cos they're guys, and I always think it's harder to SMS or MSN them casually hahaha. The girls are more chatty hahaha. Anyway, we had a four hour break where we went to play shooting games hahaha kudos to Andrea for joining us. And it was a good time catching up with them, I should do this more often!

And Christmas is coming, which means I'm spending tonnes of money on presents and gifts and cards. Easily spent like half a thousand this week alone, and I don't dare to look at my bank account balance! Okay some of it will be claimed, but Decembers are money-drainers haha. I think showing appreciation is very important, and the end-of-years always gives a nice reason to wrap things conclusively.

Alright, I skipped today's kettling and let them go do themselves instead, but going to meet them later. Now to get some work done!

3am now, and I'm not asleep because I'm thinking about my cell group. Hahaha lookie I'm so dedicated! But yeah, there is a reason why they are keeping me up. It's coming to two years and a half since I first took the Sec 1 cell, and it didn't seem not too long ago? Back then it was only just Sam and Celine; I now have over ten people in the cry room at any one Friday. I reckon if I were to sit down and count every single one of those Sec 1 to 3s that I've met in my term as their cell leader, including those that used to join us but have since moved on, including their friends of their friends, I'd have easily chalked up FIFTY new people whom I've had the awesome privilege to meet over these years. I make every effort to invite them over on Fridays, most of them came over once, and sometimes I try to think how my cell group would be like now with fifty instead of the fifteen now, had I been totally successful in trying to retain all the Sec 1 to 3s in my church and in my cell. Hahaha they say numerical growth is one of the indications that you're doing something right and you're adding believers into your meeting. I'd sure love to do that, I mean, it should be every church leader's desire for more believers right? But just imagine, fifty!! I speak spake spoke to all of them before! If I were half as enthusiastic I would have twenty-five now. I really really can go form my own youth group hahaha.

Numbers aside, it's with some form of nostalgia and regret that we're moving into new territories for next year. There will be new additions, because this year's Pri 6s are moving up, and already I've met some of them. Kinda letting go of three-quarters of my sheep now and giving them graduation rights! And it is when we let go, that all the last-minute regrets come sinking in. Like, I wished that I had done more for this person, why does it feel like I don't know him/her at all, why didn't I did this at that time, why hadn't I done this till now, etc etc. All of a sudden I feel like no no no I don't want to let go yet, God please give me an extension of my holidays and give me six more months with them! I feel like I haven't done enough, feel like I could have been a better cell leader, feel like I didn't accomplish much, feel like they're growing up faster than I could catch up.

Of course there are times when they irritate me to death, or when there's just this idiosyncratic thing for their maturity which refuses to bow over, or whatever you associate with younger ages. That's not to say they're entirely childish and immature, because they probably don't know how much of an encouragement they are to me, for every single "right" and "correct" thing that they do. The best part is sharing in their joys when they passed exams or win some competition which you've been praying for them for. Have to let them clambour over my head shouting that I'm old and expired and naggy, but also have to try and get into their world to influence them and shape their attitudes if I can.

It's been quite an exhilirating journey. I don't really want to put it down just yet. But the year's ending and I should make use of the remaining time I have, and learn from the has-beens. Looking forward to next year!

One thing which I never got around to sharing, was that several eventful things happened on Gracehaven night last Sunday! First prominent and promising thing was Tim's first worship leading, and with nice bass playing to boot too. And second were the testimonies and affirmations and thanksgivings by some of the people there. Got to catch up with old/new friends cos it was one huge gathering. And last thing was, the youth that I prayed for during appeal accepted Christ! It kinda just felt right to ask him about his salvation after praying for him, so the second prayer involved him reciting my garbled sinner's prayer! WHOO HOOOO it is a good feeling.

And was at a SNYO concert last night at Esplanade. Made me feel like picking up cello and double bass. I'm kinda just doing stuff that I haven't had the time to do when I was busy studying. Of course top of the list is sleep! Elsewhere, I'm getting down to guitar shops to snoop around, changing guitar strings, etc. Shall do my own guitar tomorrow.

I thought this day will never come, but EXAMS ARE OVER! I think it's a terrible irony that those modules which I spend more time preparing for, they do not turn out well in the actual exams; but those which I barely revised as thoroughly, the questions came out the exact way that I want it to be, and thus were manageable. Anyway now that exams are over, I have a mile-long to-do list which I, hopefully, can halve by tomorrow. And complete by the end of this week!

Short entry, which does nothing to account for the thanksgiving and elation. And dreadfully sleepy state.

I shall be unabashedly shameless here. My birthday's coming! And it's a weird feeling because sub-consciously, I know it's this Sunday, but at the same time, I'm not really feeling like it's going to be my birthday this Sunday. It's kinda there, but not there, or I don't feel it's there, or I know it's there but I don't know it's there. What am I talking about hahaha. Anyway I've been kept busy studying hard for exams, the first one is tomorrow. Which is real horrible because Saturday 9ams are for sleeping, not for exams! In any case I barely realised that my birthday is coming until like yesterday or today. Gosh it's so near!

And, I'm going to put in a request for birthday presents this year! If you love me enough, here's a wish list that you can bless me with: I wouldn't mind a Taylor or Gibson or Larrivee acoustic guitars, or you can get me a Gretsch Black Penguin because I really think their guitar tone is awesome. For the former, it'd be great if you bring me along to go and test the guitar model first, because I think I've got a stickler for sound, tone and playability.

Last year I got a record number of duck-related objects! From soft toys to figurines to files and folders to whatever else. This year, a new guitar would be great! But I'm only too well aware these will easily go into the thousands, so here's an alternative for you. I am sponsoring a child from Bangladesh through World Vision; I went up there last May to visit her and I'm nothing but blessed by that trip. Which is why I'm asking you to do the same. If a 4-digit-sum guitar is out of your budget, and if you don't want to be one of millions giving me ducky things, do consider sponsoring a child through World Vision. It only costs $45 a month, and it could mean the world to a child's life. If that kind of commitment is out of your league, you can consider the World Vision Life-Changing Gift Catalogue, which I really find very funky because you can donate specific items like pigs and cows and ducks, or rice and oil and stationery packs to specific countries. That's sort of like a year-end Christmas gift thingy, so it's not going to be valid after end of this year I think. And if all else fails, you can simply choose to make a one-time donation to them too, any amount of money will do, and I think that will be a great too.

Nope World Vision's not paying me to do this for them! Haha but if you've made the decision to donate or to sponsor a child, I'd love to hear from you so that I can keep you in prayer!

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to meeeeee!

I think I get annoyed easily when the worship cupboards or the sound room or the audi backstage is in a mess! People sometimes don't put mics back in the proper pouches or containers, or used batteries are not thrown away into the bin and just left lying around and it's annoying because nobody in the world would know if they are new or used, or horribly tangled cables that are just thrown into the drawer. Mostly cos when I need things urgently, especially for rental, I'd like to just be able to retrieve the things I need easily and conveniently. Can you imagine, in the middle of rental I need a cable desperately, but I open the drawer and take the topmost cable and out comes three other cables all tangled together!? And I spend more time unraveling the cables and setting everything up. Or when I need batteries on the fly, and I put in batteries which end up to be old ones which are dead.

Real ironic that my own table at home is in a mess, but I put more importance on tidiness in church. Like empty biscuit tins, or things falling in states of disrepair, or people not taking care of equipment. Hahaha I found a culprit today haha Yurong I think this entire issue is the bane of our friendship.

And just two hours ago I discovered missing 9-volt batteries. And it's mightily upsetting because I know there were at least three or four spare ones as of last week, but today they're all gone gone gone. I shall just take it that someone is a robot in disguise and needed urgent power. Saddening because I bought them without claiming money for it, because last month was my offering-for-anything month. And same goes for all the cables tuners capos wireless presenter whatever miscellaneous items which I bought, sometimes they go missing or are spoilt, and I'm just sighhhhh. 80% of it I pay for them without claiming (unless it's really expensive) cos I don't give a lot of offering to church, bulk of my 10% offering guideline goes to Priya in Bangladesh. It's not like I'm trying to trumpet this, but come off it, take care of common goods!

And thanks Jolene for the reminder. Need to be overflow with fruits of the Spirit. Love joy peace patience kindness goodness faithfulness gentleness and self-control. There's nine right? Yep.

This post has to go to the deserving young ones. Yesterday night was Gracehaven worship, and the customary would be for me to lead the sessions because it's like a fixture for me to be there every two months or so. But yesterday I handed it over to Melanie Meng Ren Ming Hui Tim Jolene, cos they are in training and taking steps towards worship leading. And the traditional abuse is to throw all the work to the protégés under the pretext of mentoring and practice, well, because they need the practice hahaha. But anyway, it was one of the rarer times that I visit Gracehaven services without having to go onstage. And watching them doing their stuff with worship was an indescribable feeling, sort of like watching a new generation rising and excelling better than you are. Haha I'm mightily impressed.

The year's coming to a close too, and with the coming of that it means I'm going to have to "graduate" some of the older ones from my cell group! This is the first time in at least 5 or 6 years I think, because past couple of years or so it's just been addition and addition. But just as I'm beginning to know everyone better and feeling that it's at last showing some signs of growth, it's time to move on. Alright, looking forward to next year, there'll be MR Tim Jolene on board, and they're making an impact already.

And, I kinda just realised this post sounds as if it's currently December 30th. But new year soon, new things soon.

This blog is becoming like a weekly update, but anyway school's taking a heavy turn from the usual. This coming week is the last week of school before the study break and exams! But it also means that majority of my projects and essays are gone, save for a couple which I think, or I'd like to think, is very easy. Haha the tendency for all my assignments this semester so far is to do it two nights before the submission! And I'm getting quite good grades so far heh heh. But a recent ODB reading said don't procrastinate, so well, don't procrastinate. This week kinda just flew past.

In any case, the frivolous thoughts that are running through my mind are, erm, kindergarten graduations. Because there has been a spate of hall rentals involving kindergarten graduations by various schools, so providing sound and technical support gives you the opportunity to watch free performances of children dancing in various animal costumes, and singing and reciting and the like, haha! For the most part of it it's quite nice, but my favourite segment is the certificate giving ceremony, because some child would invariably wander aimlessly on the huge stage or give back the cert to the teacher right after receiving it or start tearing the paper blah blah. It's hilarious to me, because the teachers spend so much effort to rehearse the dances and performances, but I think they always assume that this is least important part of the entire graduation. And consequently they don't waste time rehearsing for that!

Hence it's not so surprising how every performance is impeccable to the finest dance choreography, but during cert giving there's always a blur child hahaha. And it kinda amazes me how forgiving the audience is too! They would smile and laugh, but there's no condemnations at all and they're certainly way more accomodating. And I've seen standing ovations for specific children who made were too nervous onstage too. Why can't we all adopt a similar outlook?? I think for children it's always easier to pardon their mistakes, but when age seeps into a person, any small slip-ups is suddenly magnified tenfold.

Another inconsequential thought, but I suddenly feel like I don't need a new guitar anymore. Recently I've been going through online catalogues and trying out thousands of dollars of guitars and goodness knows what! But it's not a need haha it's a want. And today's worship playing support guitar with my acoustic sort of reaffirmed that. I have a nice guitar now and it doesn't warrant grounds for a new one. In fact it took quite a lashing for the past two days cos, um, I've strummed rather vigorously, and it's still awesome. How how? New, and give current away, or stick with old?

Last ramble. I recently signed up for some ladies' bags email notification! Not that I'm terribly interested in ladies' bags, but a while back I met Atiqah in school, and her friend was selling these bags at one of those flea market stalls. And I felt like I had to show some form of interest, although frankly speaking, I don't really want, or need, to buy ladies' bags?? So to be nice I told her friend that why not put me on their email subscription, and maybe I can forward it to my sister or other female friends or something. And they did, they added my email to their monthly newsletters, which didn't bother me too much except that it was rather entertaining for a guy like me to read mailers like these and I couldn't care less about ladies' bags hahaha. I never did forward them anyway, they go straight into the bin after the amusement. But, but but but but but but, the last straw came when they sent me the latest newsletter which began like this: "Hello girls!".

And I can't find the right word to describe my feelings now.  

And it's been another week of accumulated dust on this blog. I really need to blow the dust off my things and start utilising them! But October has just been a crazy month for me, with some partial church stuff and loads of essays and project meetings and presentations. So it is with a lot of anticipation and a lot of gladness that I end all my group project work tomorrow 10am! Or even earlier, depending on what time my presentation is. I still have two more essays or papers to complete before this term ends, but it's probably waaay easier because it's individual. Bah I just don't like group projects, especially group essays because I've never really figured out how are you supposed to write an entire essay with four or five others. The writing style will all be different and there will definitely be repeated information. Okay okay I shall just make sure that next semester I'm avoiding as much as I can all the modules which lists group projects in their assessment.