Read three books in two weeks! While it's slightly satisfying to see my literary mileage increase and wishing that I have a larger bookshelf, this is slowly becoming an expensive hobby. Fortunately, these three books were all borrowed from the library.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards: Elegant and eloquent, with each character fully fleshed out in thought and deed to make it very easy to identify with them. Although I thought that the plot was thin at times and seems more like something from primary school creative writing! After a while it became very moralising, but the beautiful language and the recurring motifs had me sucked in.

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold: All the themes of life, love, death, suffering and restoration were so sufficiently construed that it had me hooked on. The surprising choice of perspective adds a lot of depth to the narration, lending maturity to the entire story without distracting you by being judgmental. Beautiful, heart-warming and heart-wrenching all at once, somewhat like the film City of Angels hahaha. The only letdown for me was the horrible ending because it didn't do justice to the entire expenditure of cosmos!

The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold: Intense, dark, raw, gripping, powerful and haunting. It shows how it is possible to quietly go crazy in the midst of all the chaos and disorder. Language is prosaic but effective, and the seamless transitions between memories and present are disturbing enough on their own. There is no conceivable plot, because at times it's as though Sebold just wrote the first occurrence that came to her mind and let it go haywire from there.

Last night was Geylang again, this time with Khairul. Haven't seen him in weeks because we were both overseas at various points. So we went abit crazy by trying to instigate each other to "slap that snobbish girl" and pushing down mannequins. Anyway, I got my baju kurung! Colour is turquiose hahaha it was all I could do to make it a vibrant colour without looking weird. Ate a lot of junk food too. I wanted to be asleep by 10pm, but I reached home at around that time!!

And that resulted in me being a complete fluster this morning. Had to rush out of house for breakfast with my parents, and I forgot to bring my phone and chord sheets for worship prac! Good thing church is so near home. Had quite a smooth prac, with all the new songs and everything. During the actual worship, I was trembling like some bunny onstage! So I gripped the mike tightly with both hands and let them tremble together hahaha. But my voice didn't die although I thought it would. After service was some crowd games and was supposed to be assisting the Blokus games. Had a great time being silly, but I realised Blokus is such a self-regulating game on its own hahaha. Caught up with Luke (Balestier corps) who just enlisted into army too hahaha gosh we talked for half an hour.

I just realised I spent nine hours in church today. Without stepping outside of the building even once. This is definitely not the first time, but I'm still abit astounded. Totally exhausted. Khairul doesn't understand the emotional trauma that comes from leading worship!! Okay yeahh in a sense you can simply take it as singing songs to God, but it's crazier than that!! I can spend up to weeks meditating on what to sing, and it's another several days to choose and prepare the songs. Then I tear it apart and the songs can change drastically and I worry about the lineup. Then I spend millions of hours listening to the songs to get every musical instrument's part and exactly how to sing it and what I want, then I sit with my guitar for an eternity to try everything out. Then there's somemore meditation and tonnes of hours on Youtube to get musical variety for each song. All of these, and I haven't even started my first practice with the musicians yet. Don't even talk about dealing with nervous attacks or high notes or whatever. It's stressful!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay okay some other topic now. Marcus (Dora's brother) surprised me with his knowledge of iPods and everything! He has an iPod Touch too, okay he said it's the family's one, but how do you share an iPod with your family! Anyway his had at least a hundred different applications inside!!! And they were all free from iTunes or something like that, and he started telling me how to get it even though I tried searching for them before but I didn't know where, and how you can do this and do that and try trading in an older iPod for a new one and a million other things! It's way cool! I've never spoken more than two sentences to him before and he's telling me all these wonderful things.

Ending off. This is from Samantha's blog hahaha it's the kind of craziness I go through every Friday.

We talked abit about some stuff, and it usually ended with us laughing our heads off!! HARDEEHARHAR!!!!!!!! And of course, Celine, Vanessa and I were talking about "Girls stuff", which Guan You was NOT supposed to know about, and we had a hard time explaining it to him. And when he FINALLY understood, he said something ( I can't remember what ), and I was like " But it's not your part of growing up! ". And Celine was like " Yar! All you guys do is... is wet your bed or something like that! ". -more laughter- And Vanessa was like " Guan You!! How could you?! ". HAHA!!! I'M LAUGHING AS I TYPE THIS!! BUT IT WAS SOOOOO STUPID!!! You should have seen the look on Guan You's face!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

I seriously, seriously believe that my sec-1 cell group is dysfunctional. They are crazy and impatient and emo and grumpy and impertinent and noisy and weird and so easily distracted, but for all of that, I find myself drawing closer to them because they've taught me how not to be crazy and impatient and emo and grumpy and impertinent and noisy and weird and so easily distracted. HAHAHA. Every Friday spent with them drains me out and I looked like I just chaired a conference with 5000 members who each changes topics every three seconds.

But I still love them. For lack of a less cheesy way of saying it. How each girl occupies a place in my thoughts and in my heart. To try and be part of their lives, to guide them in church and in school and in life, to accompany them on their journey with God.

Thank you for all the trust and friendship, even when I'm cranky and old and naggy, and especially at all the times when I pooh-poohed at the important girly things (which I still don't get).

Went to Geylang with Atiqah to join in the hustle and bustle of Hari Raya! I wanna get a baju kurung, but I'm still deciding what colour and what designs and whatever else I want on it. But that's like, entirely beside the point. The more important fact is, I went out with Atiqah!! Everytime I see her, it's like at least half a year since we last met.

And it's when I'm in some pasar malam and there are hundreds of Malays around me and all the oily food and nice nice clothes and everything, that I sometimes wished that I was borned Malay!!

This is a tribute for Mingren, because he's the only one that encourages me to sing in an even higher key than what is already very high! I was fretting between G and G#, and he told me to go A. Hahaha but okay that was resolved in the end by singing in G# and him playing all the weird guitar barre chords that I don't like. Yup worship session was great. It made me happier than I already am.

And cell group time was quite chaotic. Had a birthday cake for Celine (her birthday's on Thursday), and played with candles and lightsticks and sparklers which I had to go all the way to Beach Road earlier in the day just to get it! But the fun was worth the effort. For me it's like this tradition, because it goes nicely with Mid Autumn Festival where you carry around lit lanterns and throw sparklers into the trees and set fire to everything and leave candle wax everywhere. Except yesterday was just sparklers only, and we had to clean up everything because we were playing outside church.

Left me exhausted, even though I didn't do much hahaha.

Some photos below, for the rest of it click here. And it's like the first time ever we have a complete cell group photo!

Mark your confessions:
[ ] I'm afraid of silence.
[ ] I Talk A LOT when I get really nervous.
[x] I am really ticklish!!!!!!!!!!!
[ ] I'm afraid of the dark.
[ ] I'm afraid of facing my back to open doors at night.
[ ] I can't sleep in a room if the door is open
[ ] I can't sleep in a room if the door is closed
[ ] I am afraid of gay or lesbian people.
[x] I believe in true love.
[x] I've run away from home
[ ] I listen to political music
[ ] I collect comic books
[x] I shut others out when I'm sad.
[x] I've stayed out all night.
[x] I open up to others easily.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I watch the news
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I love Disney movies.
[ ] I am a sucker for green eyes.
[x] I am a sucker for brown eyes.
[ ] I am a sucker for blue eyes.
[ ] I don't kill bugs
[x] I curse.
[ ] I have an "x" in my screen name.
[x] I've slipped and fell in public.
[ ] I've slipped out a "lol" in a real conversation
[ ] I love Spam....
[ ] I bake well
[ ] I have worn pajamas to class.
[ ] I have owned something from Abercrombie.
[ ] I want a better job
[x] Talked on a phone for 6+ hours.
[ ] I love Dr. Phil.
[ ] I like multiple people
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I am self-conscious.
[ ] I love to laugh.
[ ] I have smoked a pack in one day.
[ ] I loved Lord of the Flies.
[x] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[ ] I can't swallow pills.
[x] I have a lot of scars.
[x] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I love chocolate.
[ ] I bite my nails.
[ ] I am not comfortable with being me.
[ ] I play computer games when I'm bored.
[x] Gotten lost in the city.
[x] Thought of suicide before
[x] Seen a shooting star
[ ] Had a menage a trois.
[ ] Gone out in public in my pajamas
[ ] Have kissed someone really strange
[x] Hugged a stranger
[ ] Been in a bloody fist fight with someone of a diff. sex.
[ ] Been in a fist fight
[ ] Been arrested.
[ ] Laughed and had some type of beverage come out of my nose
[x] Pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[x] Made out in an elevator.
[ ] Swore at Liberace.
[ ] Kicked a guy where it hurts on purpose
[ ] Been skydiving.
[ ] Been bungee jumping.
[ ] Gotten stitches.
[ ] Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
[ ] Bitten someone
[ ] Been to Niagara Falls.
[x] Gotten the chicken pox.
[ ] Crashed into a car
[x] Been to Japan.
[x] Ridden in a taxi.
[ ] Shoplifted
[ ] Been fired.
[x] Stole something from your job.
[ ] Gone on a blind date.
[ ] Had a crush on a teacher/coach.
[ ]Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[ ] Been to Europe.
[ ] Slept with a co-worker, and/or employee.
[ ] Been to New York
[ ] Been married
[ ] Gotten divorced
[ ] Saw someone/something dying.
[ ] Have a list of people you want to kill.
[ ] Driven over 400 miles in one day.
[ ] Been to Canada.
[x] Been on a plane.
[ ] Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[ ] Thrown up in a bar or club
[x] Eaten sushi.
[ ] Been snowboarding.
[x] Taken a picture just for the sole purpose of putting it on myspace/friendster..
[ ] Been ice skating
[x] Cried in public.
[ ] Walked purposely into traffic with your eyes closed.
[x] Been at a party and instead of giving out your phone number you give them your myspace name and say look me up
[x] Thought of someone a lot lately.
[ ] Hate the world
[x] Love someone who doesn't realize it
[x] have your cell phone permanently attached to your hand/hip

Chris Tomlin's new album Hello Love drew a very mixed feeling that I can't quite place it! On the first front, it is reminiscent of all of Tomlin's strengths in song-writing and worship leading. It sounds like exactly like all his previous hit songs, with all the guitar/piano acoustics and high vocals and familiar build-up of the songs. On the other hand, you can't help but feel that it's deviating a bit towards the contemporary kind of worship songs.

Fav song is "Jesus Messiah", which to me is like a carbon copy of "How Great is Our God".

But it still made a good listening, especially when I'm lying on bed thinking about global issues HAHAHAHA. The lyrics felt a lot more personal and focused to me. And perhaps why I like Tomlin so much is because his songs are almost always poetic, and yet they are very declarative in essence. It makes singing and meaning the words a whole lot easier because you don't have to go very far to find ways to express your love to worship God. It's the very truth that you believe in.

Neglected this blog a bit because I couldn't find much incentive to blog. Okay here goes, my weekend so far. Friday was crazy. Went all the way to Jurong Point with Zheng Cong and Jonathan to watch Wall-E after we got out of camp. Hahaha wrong show to watch with guys I should have convinced some hot young chick to go watch that with me! But I had no idea what the show was about prior to watching it. Three weeks in Thailand had me a bit backward on movies now. Anyway, after that ended it was a crazy rush back to Bishan for youth service and cell group. I'm always reminded of how a small stumble can lead to a catastrophic result, so I think I'm a whole lot more careful with what I say and what I do now. In fact, for that matter, what I don't say and don't do is equally influential as well!

Saturday was a lethargic bummer day. Went down to Jericho for Pastor Paul's session. Yurong and I decided to go visit Tammy at her house after that ended, and we stayed there for a bit too long while doing nothing constructive. Next house was Shermin's, but she wasn't home and was there just because I had something to pass to her. Went Bishan library after that because I felt like reading.

Today was equally drowsy! I was supposed to be at church at 8.30am for worship practice, and I did wake up on time okay! Alarm rang and got me up at 7.45am, but I went back to sleep and didn't wake up until Chris called me near 9am. Horrible. The entire day was spent trying to fight the sleep demons. Had lunch, went back to church, then out to J8 again to get some cards and food and stuff.

Planning worship for the next coming Friday, and I'm very very tempted to just sing it in a higher-than-normal key because I feel like my vocal range can sufficiently tackle it. But if I do that then three-quarters of the people won't be able to reach the high notes. But if I tweak it lower I can't project it the way I want to project it. How how!

A long long time back when I was leading cell group with Biru, I remembered there was this small discussion thingy about what you really think of your cell group members. So I just randomly asked Peiying what she thought of me, and she said "NAGGY"!! Hahaha and fast forward three years later, I'm still getting stuff like "YOU'RE VERY NAGGY" from my current cell group!! It's like my old demons resurfacing. Eh this is quite self-defeating, but I'm not naggy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I happily left for Thailand while leaving everything back here in shambles! So I'm paying the price now by struggling to put everything back in order. Okaay it's not really that bad, but I still don't like to do tidying up of any mess.

With Shermin at Starbucks on Monday, then with Yurong for donuts on Tuesday, and managed to catch up with Tammy for a while too.

Went back to Seletar Camp today, and it feels foreign! I haven't really been in camp much for almost one entire month. The cookhouse aunties remembered me!

Just back from Thailand! I know how I kept going on about not wanting to go (before I left 3 weeks ago), but now that I'm back and done with it, I have to admit it's quite a good experience!! The training went surprisingly well, and we were exceptional during the eventual exercise. The hot weather was largely the enemy to beat, but that was more than compensated with the food and the people and everything else. Hahaha I had a good time picking up conversational half-baked Thai phrases, including swear words and all the stuff that I shouldn't be saying. Oh oh oh I realised that a lot of Thai girls have natural wavy or curly hair! But they like to straighten it by rebonding. Of course, all of these excludes all the flirting and teasing of all the cute Thai girls I met hahahahaha. Did get to tour some of the attractions, so it wasn't all army training.

Okay I've got four nasty pimples on my forehead, which to me is the clearest indication that I'm not getting enough sleep. SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP!