A while ago Andrea shared during cell group about the new trains on the Circle Line and on the NEL that allowed a front view of the underground tunnel. She said she gravitates to the front end of the train all the time now, and something about the lights in the tunnel being very fascinating, and she even said she was so mesmerised by it that she was smiling to herself once and some stranger beside her actually smiled back! Hahaha. And cynical me decided to just poke fun at her about the whole 'light at the end of the tunnel' thing and it never really came to mind after that. After all, MRT ride is just an MRT ride, nothing really special right????

Until we were at cell outing last week and on the way home, she dragged us all to the front of the train. And it was woaahhh very nice very nice! The headlights lit up the entire train track and tunnel, and with all the lights in the tunnel it was actually quite brightly lit. It was like some train ride in an amusement park, but without the cartoony stuff like weird characters or houses or stuff. Kinda strongly reminded me of all the action movies I watched that involves running along the underground suburb train tracks trying to get to the next station in time, before the aliens reach them or trying to be ahead of the kidnappers. When the train is approaching the next station, it was like the station was some incubated container because of the enclosure platform and the sliding doors. Hahaha the viewpoint was just different la. I think of underground train stations and I think of the trains arriving to the all-important me at the station in a whiz and stopping in front of the door that I'm waiting at. But this one is more like the train is the entire focal point of the transport system, and it's just taking transit stops and dropping/ferrying all the inconsequential people that doesn't matter in the larger scheme.

So two days ago, when I happened to be on the circle line again, I happily went to the end of the train, thinking that I'll get another magnificent view. But thing is, I went to the back of the moving train instead of the front, and there hardly were any tail lights at the back! I felt so cheated hahaha but it hardly was worth walking all the way to the front. But Andrea has a nice theory, she said this meant that you should only look ahead in your journey and look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel that will come.

It's 2:45am according to the time on my laptop now. Really should get some sleep and should start to look ahead instead of being stubborn. Thing is, I'm not a very optimistic person, which isn't what faith and hope is all about. Yeah I know that God wills and it should work out fine, but I always tend to think that human inadequacy gets in the way. Then I get stubborn and grumpy because things doesn't go the way I want, and I kick up a fuss but it gets lost in commotion after a while, then the resentment just becomes another sidelined grudge which rears its ugly head once in a while. But every now and then, God surprises me with success and brilliance that isn't part of the hatched plan, and He tells me to just trust and fall back.

I'm all riled up again, and the easy way out is to let it go out of proportions and crash bang boom. Surest way to get noticed and heard. It takes all the effort within me to keep it down, that there's much more at stake than just being difficult. But thank God for level-headed people to remind me that light at the end of the tunnel is always there, it just takes time and effort to get forward.

Been out almost every day in the past 5 days, either at church with rental or outside with cell group cycling or blading or cooking potatoes. Kinda eventful, but leaves me with very little personal time because by the time I get home everyday, it's easily past midnight and I'm just so tempted to plonk straight down into bed. But the reality is that work still needs to get down (like tomorrow's worship leading), so I will stay up till 4am and sleep in till like noon the next day. And the thing is that I don't like to wake up discovering that it's afternoon and I've slept like the entire morning away! But no choice, I think this is the holiday life hahahahaha.

Tired, and much as I want to prepare for tomorrow, my mind is just not functioning. Blame it on poor time management. Can you believe it, I did not even listen to any of the songs that I picked until now. I'm sooooooo unprepared.

Back from a 4-day Salvation Army territorial youth camp! The entire duration of the camp was just beautiful and wonderful, with all glory and honour to Jesus. I think my finite words kinda puts a limit in describing the actual victories of the camp. But above all else, God was present at the camp.

On a more personal level, my transformation took place right from day one. I'm used to 20 minute worship sets, but we did a 2.5 hour on the last night and I was beat. My group's quietly awesome too. And there's just so much energy and power throughout the camp that I was in tears and a total wreck more times that I could count.

I need to sleep. And heal my hoarse voice.

In ancient times, a king had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it.


Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the big stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. On approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. As the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the king indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many others never understand:


Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve one's condition.

_

Tired and almost ready to give up. Sigh. Why do I feel like everything has no meaning now? Then again, it's back to the same old, that if I don't try, I would have missed the blessings that I might have gained.