Went to send off Shaw and Katharina at the airport earlier today, and it's a real joy to meet people like them who consistently inspire me in my faith and challenge me in my Salvationism as I got to know them over the course of the last year and a half. They've been here for studies and work, and have also been involved in various ministries in church. And of course, it adds more international friends to visit if I ever have the chance in future. 

Weekend came and left, and I get the nagging feeling that I haven't done anything much that is productive. Although if someone else looks back on my behalf, they will probably say it's not so bad, but I feel like I want to learn something new or do something different. Haha okay next weekend! 

And lastly, I am in the preparation for a Friday topic on who is Jesus Christ. Again, I can't express how much I am impacted and inspired just from reading and researching, and for Christ's presence which is just so overwhelming. 

Keeping this short =)

Just a small little thought that is going in my head. I think the role of SMS and instant messaging and Facebook and Twitter and Whatsapp is quite indispensable to my cell group leading. For what it all does with keeping up with everybody, I think I am tremendously thankful for technology for being able to just message anyone in my cell and have a decent conversation with them from it. The obvious things that I can do with it are to disseminate prayer requests lists, or send out Bible verses, or small encouragements, but in reality I do very little of that haha. Majority of the time I get the feeling that the main fellowship of my cells operate separately from the Fridays weekly meeting, on virtual space!

And perhaps, just perhaps, sometimes I think I understand them even better through SMS, cos if I ask them out for face-to-face meetings it somehow seems are more intimidating for teenagers? Haha of course this is what they always say, that technology depersonalizes and destroys actual interactions. But I think it works in the reverse way for me, because SMS and Whatsapp brings out the more intimate and more personal sharing, and when I meet them face-to-face it breaks down more walls.

Haha quite funny how things change in a matter of a decade, cos when I first took my very very first cell group when I was 15, I didn't even have a phone! Friendster and MSN were all the rage. And when I took the Sec 1 and 2s a few years back, I know my phone was constantly abuzz with truckloads of SMSes and long phone calls (little girls). And fast forward to now, everybody in the cell or ex-cell is included in a Whatsapp group that never stops ringing cos there's 8 people all vying to speak.

Past four or five days hasn't been easy on my emotions. First thing is that the new school semester started again, and it is with an extremely poignant heart that I am embarking upon. It is probably my last proper formal education that I will devote myself to, and the final semester also marks a transitional period into working life. I'm not even sure what I want to do or where I want to work, much less even began to look. I am kinda waiting for some huge signpost to point me in the direction that I should head, but nope so far nothing haha.

More than that, Uncle Timothy Lim passed away last Saturday from cancer relapse. Past few years I had reason to get to know his family better, because his children Federic and Hannah were in my cell groups. Got the opportunity to visit him once in hospital a couple of years back too, and am just so captivated by his fervent pursuit of Christ-likeness. Think the least I could do was to accompany both my little kiddos as much as possible. It included a lot of supper, late night chats, playground time, and a lot of texting heh. Nobody handles death very well, and I have to be frank to acknowledge that I don't really know the right things to say or do for every circumstance. But the cremation service was today, and I hope that put some rest to everything that their family have been through past two or three years. 

Was away at Batam past two days for a weekend getaway. It kinda started with Amelia wanting to get out of country before school started (she is always doing this), so her and Matthew and Isaac and Priscilla and I all went holidaying! We booked a villa at a resort with really nice waterfront view, and it came with its own private swimming pool! Needless to say we were swimming every opportunity we could get, and board games and cards and TV and a little bit of shopping and arcade and lots and lots of junk food.

Really appreciated the time away from everything before my final semester in school starts again tomorrow, but to be honest I don't really enjoy such kinds of holidays where I don't really do anything at all! Haha I'm the kind of traveller that likes to go and do something or see something, and I will gladly stay in one foreign city by myself for a month (if my mum ever allows) and just live there. If you tell me beach resort with sun sand sea swim, I'll just baulk mostly.

But probably what made this great fun was the company of people I was with, and how I had to be the one jumping into the cold pool last every time cos we were putting the camera on timer, and each of us with a facial mask under the stars at 2am. There is a picture of my hideous masked face, but I think I shouldn't put it up here, lest it horrifies thee.

I usually try to do an annual recap post before the new year begins, but as always there are tonnes of things that happen during year end that makes it impossible for me to sit down quietly and think through this. This is a little bit belated, but there was the customary stayover in church after Watchnight service, and we were tearing the walls down with some mass games here and there. Past couple of years I didn't quite make it through the entire night, so usually by 4am or 5am I am scooting off back to my home to sleep, but this year just seems more energetic somehow. I don't think anyone really slept throughout the night for this year, and it was a great fellowship to start/end the year, following all the outings and camps in December.

I think every year I force myself to do a recap because it helps me to give thanksgiving and praise for all the good things in the year, and I try to see where my next step should be in the new year. Generally I think 2012 has been an excellent year for me, just that the first half of the year didn't really get off with a huge bang! Usually it gets really crazy by middle of the year because I would have gone overseas or have some church camp to help out with, but I think this first half of last year was relatively quiet. I totally cannot remember what I did for my 3-month summer break, except that I was in Sydney and Melbourne for Hillsong Conference! That was a good refreshing break for my soul, and as ever a great opportunity to come back to Singapore fresher to serve in all my various ministries. And of course, the year-end preparations for all the various camps and not really being home for most of December.

This is probably as much as I can remember of my 2012. It was quite a busy year, especially when I throw in school into the equation. I know I have told myself countless times to reduce my commitments in church and let go more so that I am not doing so much in church all the time, but somehow or rather it still feels like I am spending time in church almost every other day! Okay truth be told I am really not as involved in worship ministry as before, and a lot of people around me are picking up the things which I don't have to worry so much about. Church is really my safe haven to escape from school before I go home, mostly because it is in limbo and in transit en route home.

The new year has been quite ineffably ambivalent so far. If you remember my caterpillars, one of them metamorphosized into a nice butterfly, but the other didn't make it. Releasing the butterfly took ten minutes because there was quite a strong wind and it was testing its new wings. Which is somewhat how I feel about the new year. For one thing, it is going to be my last semester in NUS, and very likely the last 5 months of studying that I will do in a long time. I don't know where I should work in, I don't know what I want to do, and I don't really have much openings or offers given to me either. And adding to that, I committed myself to another two years of youth leadership, when I'm not at all certain what this additional two years will bring. It really feels like I've been doing this too long and too much, but it doesn't feel like a chore nor a burden also. Possibly the only reason why I'm staying put is because God isn't telling me to go anywhere.

Which is why everything has started now, even though my new cell group for 2013 has not officially met together in full strength yet! Already, the small little ones that Celine and I are going to be in charge of have already been telling us excitedly about their new schools and what CCAs they are going to choose and what new phones their parents are getting for them. I think the P6 camp and the youth camp of last year helped tremendously, and I am looking forward to new experiences and new challenges with this new cell group. 6th  consecutive year of doing this. Here we go.