Been trying to get into the mood of running these two weeks! Aaron, Tim and Dezmand are strong influences in my decision to dig out my running shoes again. Another factor is with the passing of my 21st birthday, my IPPT window is officially open (I have a lull period of 8 months due to late ORD and late birthday). Hahahaha. Technically speaking I have a year to clear it la, but I really need to get my fitness in check. My runs are getting better, although I have aching muscles every day haha.

And tomorrow is Japanese Studies, which is MCQ, which I really don't like because the tendency then is for it to be super detailed-driven and tricky. If it's essay I still can anyhow write la. But MCQ aarghh, means I really have to memorise every useless detail.

Okie. Back to the course pack.

I like to think how relationships are both a process and a product. It takes intentional effort to maintain and build up trust, and the culmination of what results is essentially a testimony of what went into it. I know I'm not the most persistent person to do that. Have that tendency to abandon things halfway especially when it is just developing into something better. But I'm bored laa, I just don't have that strong commitment to sustain it.

And maybe that's why I have so many disjointed and dysfunctional relationships. And it makes matters worse when all those unburned bridges still provide a gateway to the memories. I don't like it, memories have a way of diluting and distorting things.

I really should just try to put my selfish pride away. Mending is better than ending. 

21st November came and left, haha just another day to add to my 7671 days on earth hahaha. I feel very old and very young at the same time, neither fully adult nor still considered a teen. Time spent mostly studying! Falling behind in my revision as I would have wanted it to be. But I did have some celebrations here and there, so thank you thank you!! Some of them turned up in pink tee shirts ahaha! Appreciation to all the Facebook messages, SMS-es and calls and MSN and greetings too! My Gmail was an innocent sufferer:

And I thought I was too old for duckie stuff too, but turns out I got the most duck-related presents this year. I think it's quite convenient, especially if you like ducks or cows or snails or whatever, then the greatest tendency is to get you all the ducks and cows and snails for your birthday and for Christmas. My ducks for this year, among other presents:

THANK YOU ALL!!!! Appreciated and grateful!

Andrea asked me why we seldom sing Hillsong Kids songs for worship, because she said she heard Sunday School playing a few of the songs for their worship. So that kinda prompted me to go dig out the Hillsong Kids albums that are sitting rusted in my iPod. And I have to admit, it's really quite nice! It's easy to sing, the lyrics are really straightforward and direct too.

But I've got a slightly bad experience with Hillsong Kids! Hahaha the last time for YP Sunday, the Sunday School teachers requested for "You're The One", and if you go listen to it, it has millions of synthesized sounds and techno beats! It's a great upbeat song, just that it's quite hard to reproduce it with a normal worship team with guitars keyboard drums. And I remember fretting for days, trying to experiment with different styles in order to retain the energetic nature of the song. Hahaha which is partly the reason why I ignore Hillsong Kids when it comes to worship planning, too much artificial sound and too hard to recreate haha.

Okay la, at least now I will listen to those albums more. Kids' voices are kinda cute. Andrea nice and pretty laa hahaha thanks thanks!

Through some last minute invitation, Eunice asked me if I wanted to accompany her for a day trip to Kukup and Johor Bahru last weekend. One of her auntie's church activities and a few of her other aunts and cousins were going. And I was thinking oh well it's the last week of lessons, so I could make use of this one-day holiday opportunity before I start my revision for exams!

Quite glad that I went. I was afraid I will be shy because I don't know anyone from that church and I don't even know Eunice's auntie and I don't know the itinery and I don't know what to expect. But turned out I knew Sophia (Gracehaven social worker) whom I was introduced a few months back, and the people were really nice, so it wasn't that awkward. And the places were some pineapple museum, boat trip to Kukup fishing village and shopping at JB. With loads of food and travelling haha. Okay la it really was quite interesting, apart from shopping because everything is pretty much the same as in Singapore and Eunice and I aren't shopping enthusiasts.  

Had fun today, thanks Eunice for the company and for all the *ahem* hahaha.

I'M VERY HAPPY TODAY hahaha it's the last day of lessons and school for this semester! Okay haha that's excluding the fact that I still have exams in about 2 weeks time, but no more lectures and tutorials and having to wake up early just to be on time. And and, submission of Japanese Studies project today, and another submission on Saturday (Cultural Studies which is comparatively much easier than the headache Japanese one), which brings to an end my terribly disjointed sleeping hours. Next sem I must avoid modules involving group projects as much as possible, it gets my blood boiling brr brr brr. And I thought minimum I have to stay in school till 4pm to be in time for project submission deadline, but I was out of school by 12.30pm today hahaha this is splendid.

In any case, this is entirely over. Time for a good night's sleep tonight, and then studying for exams.

Next semester I am sooo going to fight for all the modules which does not require group work! I think I have relatively nice project mates, as in that they are nice friends to have la. But I think it's a totally different thing when it comes to academic writing! UGHH I think it really gets on my nerves and I don't want to complain complain complain. I rather do a solo piece of work and if I get lousy grades or if I make a really bad mistake, then at least I can only blame myself.

And it's crunch time now, my last two projects are due by this weekend. Following that is revision and exams. Oh well, getting really busy to have much spare time at all.

And today's the first official and real Tues where I don't have to stay in school till 6pm and get caught in the traffic jam back home.

I feel quite terrible neglecting this virtual space to organise my thoughts. Even though my blog page is my internet browser home page, so everytime I open Mozilla it "invariably and inevitably" opens up to my blog. But I've really been too busy in school or in church or doing other things. Tonnes of stuff in my to-do list and every day it's a battle with the clock to finish my work on time so that I can get at least 4 to 5 hours of sleep. In the past I would adopt the work-first-sleep-later mindset, but I can't do that now haha age is creeping up with me. If I don't sleep enough, the sleep debt rolls over and accumulates and drags me under.

Highlight of the week was meeting Jaslyn by a chance encounter in school, and we spent my 3 hour break studying eating and her providing valuable insights for my life. Haha which was really enlightening, because my thoughts are in shambles now and that was just what I need.

And getting rejected to donate blood again! I want to be a willing blood donor, but they keep rejecting me! This time due to stupid cough syrup, because it might pose some allergic reactions. And this is the third time! First was in JC when I wasn't 18 yet and I didn't sign the parental form. Second was fever a week ago, so I can't donate. But it's really silly because I have no phobia of needles and they poked me at least twice in army to draw blood. In the end, of Rachel Dezmand Cassandra and myself, only Cass passed all the tests to donate.

Okay. Will try to update this space more if I could.