Was invited by some of the youths from Balestier Corps to help out with their worship sing-along session today. It was an honour and priviledge to be part of their service, and together with Matthew we've been practising with them for the past 2 weeks or so. And Balestier Corps has been quite close to my heart in recent months, because when I was working at THQ I was quite close with Auntie Irene and Auntie Judy. And of course I do catch the young people around too, because they are always hanging around in church on weekends.

I think it's always a special blessing for me to get to know the families and friends from other churches. Not that I'm already conversant with every single person from my own corps, but I think it's good to have neighbourly relations with families of the same faith. That's one small good thing about having 3 church services happening on a Sunday morning, in the same building on the same floor! But now that His Arrow Church has shifted out, it's much quieter and I do miss their presence. Although I've promised to visit them one Sunday, and that's a story for another time.

Quite amazing, all I did was to lend my guitar to Amy for a week, and before I know it a door of opportunity is opened to get to know them better!

Did something slightly different for cell group time today. With the intention of reaching out to our community, we went out to a nearby block and went door-to-door selling copies of the War Cry! I didn't know that War Cry could be sold publicly, until I found out last year. Goes to show how much I take it for granted, because I always only scan through it looking for pretty girl pictures or for people that I know! Hahaha but Yen from editorial gave me a stack of old copies of the entire year, so I've resolved to read it more.

But yup, the door-to-door sales was quite fun to do, it was a great opportunity to meet people and explain what it's all about. I think of all the houses we knocked on, only half of them entertained us, but we still manage to sell about 15 copies, which is not bad for an hour's work! We had fun going around, tiring and slightly disappointed at all the missed opportunities, but did get to meet really nice people who were extremely supportive.

And the happy promoters hahaha.

I'm dusty and rusty. Brain is totally not in study mode, the only thing I am interested to read are story books or Christian devotionals, because that's all that I've been reading in the past 3 years! Guitar is not in a playable condition too, because I took a break from all worship related activities for 3 or 4 weeks and now my fingers are cramped and abrasion which is sooo pain and guitar doesn't sound good!

Can I extend that to my life too, because I'm just so out of touch and everything is so maudlin and melancholic. I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep and do nothing all day.

I've got a bunch of unwanted stirrers with me now! The English lecturer gave it out just now because we're on phonetics and she wanted us to try pronouncing some words and feel the vocal vibrations. And I was at a corner so the leftovers all came to me! And I made the girl beside me walk all the way to the back just to pass the stragglers the extra stirrers! I could have done it myself, but I told her to pass it to the back, and she misunderstood and instead of passing it person-to-person she went personally. So paiseh.

Through a really nice opportunity and timing and coincidence, I went for one of Janice's netball matches with Auntie Adeline today! Hahaha it was a really last minute thing, but it was quite a good experience, because I've never watched a netball game before and I don't know the rules and positions and everything. You know in all the cell leaders' manual they always include "support them in their games, recitals, performances and the like", so I thought why not, give Janice a surprise too hahaha! She played very well! Jump here jump there like kangaroo and scoring so many and shouting like a true captain, and of course they have to win eventually laaa! And Auntie Adeline is such a loyal supporter hahaha she knows everybody on the team and she knows the coach and the teacher and all the rules and which player is new and who is outstanding.

Boring day made interesting and happy, thanks for the fellowship and the car rides Auntie!

There's this little tab in the CORS website which says "File for Graduation", and I'm always clicking on it because it's so tempting! Hahaha I remember the first time I was bidding for my modules, and I kept asking Atiqah if that option was for me, even though I haven't even attended a single lecture at that point! But that's my escape from reality button. Everytime the bidding or balloting becomes too much of a hassle, or everytime I'm fed up with the jargon that I don't understand from the readings, the "File for Graduation" becomes very appealing.

But it's been pretty fine, every morning is a travelling nightmare but I haven't been late so far. I'm thinking that all Tuesdays are Mondays because I get Mondays free. Thinking if it will be a good idea if I read all my readings from the laptop instead of printing them out. And trying to shake the cobwebs from my brain. Study study!

This is the kind of stuff that embarrasses you, but it brings back fond memories. A while ago Sarah asked me how long have I been in the cell group leading business, and I told her since I was 15! I did take a year long break when I enlisted army, but it's still a whopping 6 or 7 years. Been a leader longer than I've been a cell group member myself. But what a learning process it has been for me, growing, realising what to do and what not to do, and still learning. A good number of my old cell group members are still around, and I really appreciate being able to be part of their lives even till now.





Can't remember what occasion this is, but I remember Ming Hui asking "can my sister come too?" and that's how everyone ended up there. But we all look so foolish and so young hahaha.

Hahaha! I'm quite glad that Mondays are free for me. Not that I usually get attacks of Monday blues, but just that I am lazy to get out of bed after the weekend! Yup, bummed at home trying to study. So many readings, I'm quite astonished.

And went out with Samantha to watch Up! Hahahahahaha. Nice show, a bit far-fetched but I liked it. (I don't want to say anymore haha).

I'm generally happy right now. Happy that things are falling back into place, happy that I've got the exact words to say at exact moments, and happy that things are clearing up and looking brighter. Although it wasn't really in shambles to begin with. But I'm just thankful, thinking that I'm the most blessed person in the world (no I'm not attached yet).

I like talking to people, just hearing them out and listening to what really matters in their hearts. Or just plain foolish talk with nothing in mind but to chat nonsense. Kinda relieving from stress and whatever else actually.

Thinking about life and all that it has to offer. You know, this book that I'm reading now is messing up my life up a little, it really questions the purpose of life and chasing after worldly things. Accolades and achievements, they all fade. What are the eternal consequences, and it's back to the microcosm of the universe when what you think really matters has nothing at the end but a dusty cupboard hidden in some attic. Sounds really useless to me, time to invest in all of heaven's entirety which I have been neglecting.

Started school this week! University life is boringzzzz. Maybe because it's all intro lectures for this week. Did meet quite a lot of old friends, church, army, school, wherever. But the people I sat next to in all the lectures so far are strangers who bother to talk to me. Got lost on first day, and waited at the wrong lecture hall the second day! But I wasn't late haha.

Reading this book called "Living on the Ragged Edge". Talking about the book Ecclesiastes. Especially apt for all the thoughts that are going through my mind now. Hahaha twisted world.

This is some retarded thing that Jerrold and me decided to do.

Fiesta Oneness today at Labrador Park. Great time catching up with all the adults and meeting new people and talking playing. Usually I don't get to talk to everybody that I want to talk to on a Sunday service, and it's a pity because there are so many familiar faces and names that I always hear about, but I barely know them aside from hellos and byes. So here's finally a non-threatening platform to ask legitimately what do they do, how are they related in church, blah blah.

This year's "getting to know you" year. I've been trying to get my ears on the ground! Not so much about looking pretty, but just trying to catch up with people. Sometimes you can know someone for years, but you barely talk to them much. I want to do that, but there's too many people that I want to catch up with hahaha. But thankful for the chances and the way my appointments just fall into place. Been trying especially to spend time with each person in my current cell group, be it phone or SMS or MSN or meals or movies or guitar lessons or whatever. My way of trying to get into their lives and to know them better. I wish I had more time to do this.

My heart and mind is in a turmoil. And perhaps an overdued one too. It doesn't take much for me to realise what I've been doing and what I haven't been doing. But yeah, sometimes I'm just too prideful or I'm lazy to deal with it or I procrastinate or I find excuses.

And that reminder had to come in a big manner through Pastor Elaine. Thank God for her life and for her ministry. I'm kinda sheltered in a sense, you know, like I'm not very big with spiritual healing and speaking in tongues and prophetic visions. Not denying that these gifts have a place for edification in the church, but just that I didn't grow up in a church background which placed much emphasis on these. I know enough to know but not know at the same time. But Pastor Elaine's words hit a huge raw nerve. Okay I cried more for others than for my own prayer, but it's still a wake-up call and it's a blessing.

I'm really tired but very satisfied. Sometimes I wonder how pastors does it, you know, trying to be the sponge to absorb everything, happy or sad, weddings or funerals. Still, thank God for my cell group for keeping me sane, contradictory as that might sound.

Was watching NDP on television. No love lost there! My contributions for the past 2 NDPs included crazy guard duty schedules and zooming around in boats at Marina Bay! I've done my part, with stories to tell too. Thought I saw Celine on telly, but then again I couldn't be sure.

Bummed at home the entire day. Slept until 12 noon, then slept again from 4 to 6pm. Did nothing the whole day except to pack a small portion of my room, and I managed to get out quite a few things which I can put in for Salvation Army donation. Tomorrow will be the messy table's turn.

Haven't been this "unproductive" for months. Just sitting around and watching TV and doing nothing. It's like a vacation, at home, don't need to spend money, mum buying food back or cooking. What a life!

Weekend was quite a toll. YP Sunday was a great joy, the pretty girl beside me (who is always just too shy to talk to me haha) had to dance gingerly to avoid my guitar and music stand. It's really pumped to be part of the energy on stage, never been more lucid. Went down to Funan and Sim Lim a couple of times on two separate days too, to get a new laptop.

And today was meeting at Gracehaven, I thought it was just Capt Raymond and Capt Hary and YOG reps, so I went in tee shirt and shorts. Then it turned out to be some corporate official meeting and everyone's in nice collared shirts! Never mind la, I'm youth department haha I passed off sporty enough.

Currently trying to put sense into the things that I'm doing.